Thursday Night Football: The Morning After

Most people who know me don’t have me pegged as a football kinda girl. Let me tell you, I am a HUGE football kinda girl.

Football season is my favorite time of year. It encompasses all good things: my birthday, autumn, Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. All the good of every year is contained in the 24 weeks of pre-season, regular season, and post-season. 24 straight weeks of awesome sauce.

The Washington Redskins are my team. Yes, they lose often and when they lose they lose badly. One gets used to the disappointment because they have so much potential. There are no fair-weather Redskins fans. We are in it for the long haul because when they win the feeling is indescribable.

Living in Minnesota, however, it is difficult not to be a Vikings fan. Well actually, with the season they have had this year it’s pretty damn easy to not be a fan…but I digress. As I enjoy watching all the Sunday football games I inevitably catch the Vikings game so I’ve become a fan by proxy. It happens…the Redskins will always be my #1 but the stations don’t show Redskins games around these parts.

Last night the Thursday Night Football match-up was the Redskins and the Vikings. What a game. Seriously. I had put all of my money on the Redskins. I mean…the Vikings with their measly 1-7 record and their carousel of quarterbacks was not a winning pick.

Touche, Vikings.

So, after much disappointment and confused feelings, I have composed some thoughts.

Dear Redskins,

I love you. I always have and I always will…but we need to talk.


You went into the locker room last night winning 27-14. I don’t know who came out of that locker room after halftime. They looked like Redskins players but they turned out to be some half-assed doppelgängers that were not programmed to play football!

Your defense is killer. Your offense is fantastic. While the rest of the world looks on in terror as Robert Griffin III is about to get his ass kicked he is thinking, “It’s cool. I got this.” And he does. So how is it that you lost last night?

The Vikings even TRIED to help you win! With 30-some-odd seconds left in the game and you are in possession of the ball on the ONE YARD LINE the Vikings called a time out. You should have come back from that time out with the game-tying play. Yet you all said, “Thanks, but no thanks,” and proceeded to throw your win in the garbage.

I just don’t get it. I probably will never understand. I will see you next week nonetheless. It may kill me one day, but I will always be your loyal fan.

Dumbfounded, but Forever Loyal

And to the Vikings:

Dear Vikings,

You know, you tend to play harder when you are losing. If you played that hard all the time you probably wouldn’t lose so many games. It’s not rocket science. It’s just football.

I Only Like You Because I Live Here


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